Tracy: Who am I as a communicator?

Sunday, March 25, 2012

Who am I as a communicator?

I asked myself, my son, and my boyfriend to complete the assessment. The results surprised me. When it comes to the communication anxiety assessment I scored myself the highest. I am not sure why that is. I must appear calmer then I actually am when it comes to public speaking. They must not see the tension and anxiety I feel when I think I might have to speak in public (Rubin, Sypher, 2009). My son scored me as a 42 and my boyfriend scored me as a 45. I think it is possible they see me as a confident speaker in some situations.

I scored myself a 63 in the verbal aggressiveness scale. The description that fits this number is perfect for me. I maintain a good balance and consideration for others viewpoints and argue fairly. I also attack the facts rather than the person holding that position. My boyfriend and son scored a lower number for me on this assessment. That is good news in that they must think I am respectful of other people's viewpoints and attempt to change their mids with gentle, inoffensive suggestions that do not attack their self-concept (Rubin, Sypher, 2009).

I scored in group 1 on the listening styles portion. My boyfriend and son scored me in group 2. They know that I prefer clear, to the point communication. I like few details and efficiency when it comes to communication. I think I am more sensitive to others feelings then they felt I was. Obviously that is something I will need to work on. My perception of the way I listen is different than what they think. I don't want to be intimidating and want to be a respectful listener.

I will use this information in my professional and personal life. I was surprised that I scored so well by two important people in my life. My 12 year old son son and I sometimes have a difficult time communicating so really wanted him to complete the assessments. I thought I would score a lot worse than that. So that is good news.

References:
Rubin, R. B., Palmgreen, P., & Sypher, H. E. (Eds.) (2009). Communication research measures: A sourcebook. New York: Routledge. “Communication Anxiety Inventory” and “Verbal Aggressiveness Scale

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"My Connections to Play"

Two quotes:

Vygotsky - "Children use private speech in play to regulate behavior"

"Creative play is a central activity in the lives of healthy children."
Almon, K. (2002) The vital role of play in early childhood
education. Gateways, 43.

My family, especially my mom, was very supportive of play. She recognized its importance. My sister and I loved to play with our friends. She would take us to the community pool and parks and we would play all day. When we got a little older we got a trampoline and jumped on it for much of the day. We had a playroom above our garage in Tennessee and we played there for many hours even though it got very hot at times. My sister and I loved to play with dolls. My mom always said she would be my best friend and as we got older did not encourage many outside friendships. I think that hurt our social skills a little. Now we talk every once in a while, have very different lives and see each other about 2-3 times per year. Even though we are still very close and had many years of play as children, we have drifted apart. My dad was really good at playing with us also. He took us on our boat all the time and encouraged more of the rough and tumble type of play. Both my mom and taught us to be resourceful and take care of ourselves, almost to a fault.

As I attempt to write my blog assignement I feel play has changed a great deal since when we were younger. We would go all day without seeing the inside of our house and find things to play with. All three of my boys are sitting around my table asking me questions and saying they are bored. I live about 2 blocks from one of the most beautiful lakes and beaches in the country and 1 block from an elementary school playground. There are children all over this neighborhood to play with and they are asking me what they can do. Where have I gone wrong in this scenario? They have come to rely on me as their "social director" and I have probably enabled that. Play is very different. I am going to cancel cable and hide the playstation and nintendo ds's for the summer. My kids are older and possibly beyond help. I hope that young children will be pulled away from the computers, tv and other electronic devices. I hope they will be in a safe place to be able to venture out and make friends. Parents need to be more confident in their childrens ability and need to become independent players. I think sometimes parents protect their children and don't let them make mistakes at an early age.

I have included pictures of my boys below at the beach. This is what we love to do these days. This was on a spring break vacation. My youngest sons favorite toy was a palm branch he found the first day. Again, an item from nature that I didn't have to purchase that entertained him. Nice!!